Packing Puzzle

I spent my long weekend moving apartments and being sick, neither of which I was originally anticipating. We were planning on apartment switching the week before, but lucky me, I landed overnight call that weekend, and I didn't want to move in the morning and then go see sick kids. So moving fell to the long weekend. Which is good in terms of getting an extra day to settle in and move, but it sort of sucks because I wanted to fully enjoy the long weekend, not spend endless hours moving and cleaning and stressing about it all.

Spending the week packing was difficult in making everything fit as neatly and efficiently as possible. It's like playing tetris with boxes and little items. I was super lucky in having so many awesome friends help out, all of whom were a whole lot stronger than me, too, which was helpful in moving boxes that I personally couldn't really lift. I'm proud to say this time around, I was much better at packing things without just throwing things into little plastic bags. Crates were packed to the max, boxes were consolidated. My kitchenware was also packed quite efficiently in its gigantic crate, and without my mom's help, which makes it more impressive. Although to be honest, a lot of that credit goes to my friend. He was the mastermind of the packing. And he practically single-handedly set up the new apartment for my roommate and me, helping us put our mattresses and furniture in their right places, putting together my futon, and setting up our wireless internet so I can type this happy vent session. I never truly realized how lost I am without being able to use the internet, and more than that I really don't know what I'd do without him.

Moving was stressful as hell, complicated by cleaning of the old apartment and all the dramatic shenanigans that go alongside it. And of course, cleaning also pretty much always takes longer than anticipated too. But I would say as of today, the old place is completely cleaned up and our new place is prob 95% unpacked. Just need to do a quick wash of the floors of our new place, unpack a few of my random plastic bags lying around and things will be put to rest. 

I'm so glad the move is over, although it does kind of suck that it pretty much took the whole weekend so I didn't get to study or really hang out and enjoy the lovely weather. I'd rather play a real game of tetris than have to move anytime soon.

Are you competent enough to be a doctor?

Today I took yet another exam, though one of a different nature. As a medical student, you have to be able to talk to and counsel patients in addition to the typical "let's come up with a diagnosis and figure out what the heck's wrong with you." It's officially tested with standardized patients, so our school helps us prepare for it with a little mini half day exam of their own. It's supposed to help us get ready for said exam but also for themselves to make sure we're competent. Again, makes sense. But they make it harder than the real thing, and so in a way this makes it even more stressful. Am I competent enough to become a doctor in a mere year?I ask myself that often, and honestly I don't know. I swing back and forth on that. But I do hope that at least come August, I am good enough to pass the exam for real.

So long story short, I took mine today (the practice exam needed to pass third year of school) and am have a serious fear I failed said practice exam. Having only 15 minutes to talk to, examine and counsel the patient was just not enough time for me to organize my thoughts and come up with a diagnosis. I normally take forever to at least come up with a differential diagnosis, let alone figure out what tests to order, so this was a little rough. What's the most frustrating is that, as a naturally anxious stressed out person, listening to people discussing the exam afterwards is even more stressful. Overhearing students asking what they thought the diagnoses were and whether you elicited some of the secret history makes me panic, especially when I missed doing some of those things and forgetting to ask the obvious questions. It sends my nerves into overdrive. I was so nervous this morning I almost passed out.

I have to say though, one of the nice things about taking the exam today was having my friend take it with me. He drove us up there, which was good because after the adrenaline rush wore off, I felt completely worn out and driving home would've been painful, if not bordering on dangerous. He was also there with a hug and a smile, and helped (at least temporarily) take the panicky edge off, because I actually came out of the exam feeling ok, and it wasn't until listening to other people recapping with each other that I realized truthfully how much I had missed. Sometimes it truly amazes me how much friends and a hug (ok, and a beer) can help get you through things. It's its own kind of medicine.